Parents with son and daughter happily running through a fieldWhen the bible said, “what GOD has put together, let no one pull apart” I believe it is referring to the children that come from a marriage. Not the contract or the institution itself.

Do you both still love your kids?

I would never suggest staying together for the kids, but if you both truly do love your children, they become the one green leaf that a new marriage contract can be built upon. The logic is simple, what would happen if you divorced? You would both be seeing other people, and you would be giving up your right to parent your child 30-100% of the time to another person of solely your partner’s choosing that would be completely out of your control!

So you can live apart, separate your finances and find other partners, but if you both deeply love your children, they will always keep the two of you together in some fashion. You will always be in communication. You will be running into each other at events that are important to your kids.

Now that we have worked backward, try thinking forwards. Consider the kind of family and life you and your partner want to experience. Image the kind of experience you want your kids to have growing up. What kind of commitments can you and your partner make to one another around these goals, and what would you be willing to consider that previously seemed out of the question?

Check in next week for Conversation 2: Where Is Our Desire And Love?

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