Is Our Marriage Ripe For Emotional Affairs?
Right behind Desire comes Romance. Romance is the focusing of attention from all the options we see every day, to the one or two that we really connect with and want to deepen the connections. Emotional affairs are nothing more than good romances covered up. Usually under the pretense of “protecting our partners.” These usually start as co-workers or friendships through a common interest, the connection opens, and two people find someone they trust with open ears to listen. The more sharing of intimacy that happens, the deeper and more intense the connection feels. It is easy to just fall in and wonder “what happened?” by just dipping a toe in the water. It is like an accident. It wasn’t planned and any outside observer could have seen it coming.
Do you have a special friend that really gets you – that listens and really gets how you feel. More than your spouse gets you? What do you talk to them about? Make a list of things you feel comfortable telling them and not your spouse? Take stock of intimacies that are withheld from your partner – share them to reconnect and heal your relationship.
Check in next week for Conversation #3: How To Heal Sexual Shame